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Back from vacation: Any good advice out there?

December 28, 2010 By 2 Comments

It’s taken me all day to sit down and write a new blog post.  I have been incredibly lazy for the past week, and it has been heavenly.  I am wholly unrepentant that I did nothing but tweet a little and comment on Facebook.  However, all good things must come to an end; especially in my situation.

Today was supposed to be the beginning of such tasks as making a new budget for 2011 and getting a credit counselor.   I did make a phone call to the company my employer has contracted to help with such things, but that turned out to be a bust.  The woman on the phone was very nice, but had nothing useful for me.  Apparently, I can get psychological counseling, career counseling, and access to the “resources” aspect of their website, but no actual help with finances.  The resources section basically said get a budget and find a reputable credit counselor; stuff I had already figured out on my own.  There were no referrals, no real hints (“don’t spend so much” wasn’t quite what I was looking for.)

The lack of help pretty much took the wind out of my sails.  It’s hard enough to call up a total stranger and tell them I’m in need of financial relief, let alone have them say they can do nothing.  I’d like to know if I have any options, but my online research is leading me to believe all the companies are out to rip me off.  So, here’s request #1 for all you readers; is there a credit counseling company out there that can actually help?

I’m also hoping there’s a nice program out there that helps you fill out a budget – for free, of course, I can’t be spending any more to get this straightened out.  So if anyone knows of something, pass it on in the comments. 

This year was all about identifying the wounds and stopping the bleeding.  I really want to make 2011 the year I begin healing.

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10 things I’ve learned from partially reading lots of success books

September 12, 2010 By Leave a Comment

I’ve been part of several mentoring, business, and brainstorming groups and at some point in time someone always recommends a slew of books to help you succeed.  I’ve read – or tried to read – everything from “Rich Dad, Poor Dad” to “Eat That Frog!”beginning with the granddaddies of the success book, Napoleon Hill and Dale Carnegie.  And I can tell you, most of them are incredibly boring.  Yes, I know, they’re supposed to be inspirational hints that bring on those “ah-ha moments” that somehow push you to a life of success. (By the way, if anyone asks me to tell them my big “ah-ha moment” during a conference ever again, I may have to grab a knife and run amok.)  While much of the advice is helpful, it generally doesn’t take a 300 page book to get the gist of what you need to do.  I’m going to share with you a few of the success hints I have been bludgeoned with (and obviously ignored) in as succinct a manner as I can.

  1. Get up at a decent hour – To most of the rabid fans of the success book, this means getting up at 5am to meditate or run or something, review your plan for the day, get dressed, and be fresh for work at 8am.  I happen to think that if your work allows it, there’s no reason why you can’t move your schedule anywhere in the day you need.   I’d have no problem starting work at 10am if the rest of the world would let me.  It’s probably more accurate to say “don’t waste your whole day goofing off.”
  2. Have some sort of plan – Aimlessly running around with no real goal in mind will get you nowhere.  Try and decide what the heck you want in life and go for it.  Quit hanging around complaining you want a change if you don’t know what that change is.
  3. Play nice – There are huge sections in those books that talk about how being polite and smiling will get you far.  Didn’t our moms tell us this when we were kids?  You don’t have to be a hard-ass to get far in life.  If people like you they will go out of their way to help you.  Ignore this only if your definition of success means being cranky with lots of money and no one to share it with. 
  4. Don’t put off the crap work – It won’t go away, and you’ll dread it more if it is hanging over your head.
  5. Ask for help – Absolutely no one knows all the answers from the beginning.  This has the added bonus of interacting with others.  Most people love it when you go to them for advice, it makes them feel good.
  6. Let people know how and when to get hold of you – Communication is the name of the game in lots of businesses.  If you let everyone know what time you take calls, etc. and you stick to it they will generally go along with it.  I once knew a guy who was available 24/7 and told everyone.  He never got a moment’s peace.  He made a lot of money, but never got to be with his family.  That’s not success in my book. (It’s also one of the reasons I hated being a realtor.  No one thinks they deserve a regular life.  I got calls on Christmas Eve, for Pete’s sake!)
  7. Talk to people – This can be really hard for some.  Like it or not, networking will get you far in this world.  More people get jobs and accounts because they know someone than newspaper ads and cold calls ever will. 
  8. Take a chance – My dad always said, “No guts, no glory.”  Don’t be stupid, but sometimes, the safe way is the worst thing you can do.
  9. Have a little confidence – Most people are just trying to get along, and most people are of only average intelligence (hence, average.)  I’ve met some people who were very successful who didn’t seem to have much in the IQ department, but they were confident they would succeed, so they did.  I think it is often harder for some intelligent people to succeed because they know what the pitfalls really are.  As Annie Savoy said in Bull Durham, “The world is made for people who aren’t cursed with self-awareness.” (No, I am not recommending being a dullard.)
  10. Do something – Maybe you have a plan, but you’re waiting around for the right time to get started.  There is NEVER a right time; get going.

Well, that’s it.  Maybe all this didn’t work for me the first time, but I’m getting it back together and trying to follow my own advice.  My biggest comfort is that there are a lot of millionaires out there who went bankrupt before straightening out and making it work. 

The good part is; now you don’t have to go out and buy all those books!

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Weekends and illness- how NOT to be productive

August 31, 2010 By 1 Comment

“I’ll get so much done this weekend.”

Some day, I will acknowledge to myself what an incredible lie that statement is.  I never get as much done on the weekends as I’d like, or plan.  Never.  I always have incredible reasons, excuses and rationalizations for not achieving what I plan during the week.  This weekend was actually a stellar example of how my excuses, combined with happenstance and some serious bad luck all came together to keep me from getting any writing done whatsoever.  It began thusly:

I was able to finish up some critical new papers that various companies needed in order to continue to make my life difficult.   Alex and I then ran some errands that were necessary (paying the storage unit, dropping off dry cleaning, etc.) nice and early in the day.  There would be plenty of time to write that afternoon!  In celebration, Alex and I went to the outlet mall nearby to get me some new pants for work (we’ve been eating badly lately, I’m not fitting comfortably in some of my more slender outfits.)  It wasn’t in the plan, but hey, it wouldn’t take long.  On the way, we blew out a tire.  It didn’t delay us much, and we had the excitement of me watching the highway to make sure no one would hit Alex while he changed the tire, but it did keep me from buying that lovely soft sweater that cost about as much as a tire. 

On the way home, I started feeling a little under the weather.  My head felt big and my throat hurt from some nasty drainage.  “Better relax,” I thought.  “You’re heading to the Pittsburgh Renaissance Faire tomorrow; everyone’s been looking forward to it (especially Alex) so you should be healthy.  R has rehearsal at 4pm, so you’ll be leaving early.  You can write when you get back.”  So, I took some Wal-dryl (yep, cheap benedryl) and passed out for a good 12 hours.

The next morning I felt worse.  I made it to the Ren Faire and its 90 degree heat.  “No problem, just have a strawberry ice and your throat will be soothed and you’ll be fine” said the stupid voice in my head.  While I had as much fun as I could, and the ice was indeed tasty, it did not help matters.  I got home an immediately went to sleep for an hour and a half.  K made a lovely dinner for us, Alex and I cleaned up the dishes, took the dogs out, and went to bed.

Where the heck did my weekend go?

Admittedly, the illness bit did give me the excuse to sleep away a good deal of my time.  But let me tell you, I can always find a good excuse to not sit down and write.  Why?  I honestly don’t know.  I like to write.  I think I’m getting better at it.  I suppose it’s the old trap of if I don’t do it, no one will criticize me when they see it.  I’m not reaching for compliments here; it wouldn’t help even if you gave one.

I just have to keep telling myself that I finished a book once, I can do it again. 

Whoops!  Looks like I have to take the dogs out.

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